Animals love pretty much unconditionally and quickly adapt to their surroundings. They convey their boundaries almost immediately and without regard to worry about what others think. They learn the boundaries set by others pretty easily. Then, there’s their natural resilience. It’s all amazing to witness and mind boggling to me at times.
Recently, my partner and I welcomed Gomez into our family. He’s a rescue kitty from Houston Pets Alive. My partner has had many cats over time. I’ve been around cats here and there but never have I been a cat daddy, much less a kitten daddy! It’s been amazing to witness how this kitten operates and experience his love. He’s inquisitive, tenacious, incredibly loving, playful, flexible, chill, and brave. These are all qualities I admire in others and traits I attempt to help my clients develop.
What I love most about Gomez, other than just how cute and cuddly he is, is how in just a few days he’s set his boundaries with our two dogs. They already know where they stand – what they can get away with and what they can’t. Humans, in contrast, struggle setting and holding boundaries. It’s weird, but true.
What would it be like to set boundaries like our pets do? To identify to others what’s ok for us and what’s not? Boundary work is something I love to do with clients. It really helps, over time, because it’s identifying what works for us within our human relationships and what doesn’t. It’s putting ourselves first so that our relationships with others flourish. When we flourish so does life.
Are you looking to put yourself first? I invite you to reach out to me and I’ll help you be like Gomez – living life easier with less distress. (Sadly though, I likely can’t help you find two fantastic gay dads to take you in.)